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Millennials

Learning from Millennials

Insights from Millennials

I read a blog post  from Huffington Post recently that solidified my thoughts on the wisdom of youth and evolution of the collective unconsciousness. Today’s young adult generation “Millennial’s”, to a large degree, realize intuitively something that took me many years to learn and that is that Boomers got it all wrong with the workaholic consumer driven behavior that we adopted in the eighties. I will not repeat the full list of Millennial insights discussed in the blogpost, but a few really resonated with me.

The first is “Do what you want”. I still struggle with this. I still try to do what I think “I should be doing.” I want to give back and strive to do it, but frankly, giving back by using the core energies that I have used for so long that I feel like I’ve used them up and no longer suit me, is just not cutting it. I find myself doing some things that I hate. This is draining and makes me feel the same way that I did when I was in corporate. I know that I either need to reframe the way that I am doing this particular thing or simply not do it. Seems pretty simple right? But I question whether many boomers really know what we want to do as opposed to what we think we should be doing.  I have a client who tells me that I am the voice in her head, and this amuses me because I wish that the voice in my own head was the voice that she hears. Unfortunately for me, the voice in my own head tends to sound an awful lot like that of my parents.

I suspect that most Millennials were raised by a higher level of consciousness from their boomer or Gen X parents than Boomers were from their “Greatest Generation” parents. The guilt, fear and scarcity that we were raised with is still paying dividends all these years later. Perhaps for Boomers to do what they want – rather than denying our needs – we have to finally reparent ourselves.  I thought that I had, my actions recently however – tell me otherwise. Wasting a day of the few that I have left is simply not in my best interest.  There are ways of paying it forward that do not drain me.  And frankly, I do not need to be paying it forward all of the time. I did not leave too much on the field of play in the first half of my life, so having fun now is okay.  So “do what YOU want to do” is my new motto and I encourage you to adopt it as well.

Millennials and technology

Another item on the Millennials list of “givens” that stuck out to me is to “Embrace Technology.”  This is something which I have always thought that I was naturally good at.  But in retrospect, I find that I was doing it with preconceived notions on what “effective” and “legitimate” uses of technology constitutes. I was basing this on the tools with which I’m comfortable such as  personal computers and laptops, but not smart phones, social media, and leading edge inventions coming out of modern scientific knowledge today.

Over the weekend, I discovered (via an email from Integral Enlightenment) a set of software from iAwake Technologies designed to improve the  quality of your mediation experience.  This is technology that I have seen and even played with to a certain degree.  Last Christmas, my wife gave me a product that used bio feedback to improve your mediation experience.  I have tried it, but found that staring at a computer to see that my pulse and breathing was in harmony with what it should be was not really effective for me.  My respiration count and resting heart rate are already under control.

The technology from iAwake, however, simply uses entrainment of the brain to deepen the meditation experience.  I am using this twice a day, for forty minutes each time.  I have never been able to meditate for that length of time prior to using this technology.  I have found that is is now almost effortless to hold my mantra in my mind, and I am no longer beset by hundreds of thoughts during my meditation.  This has resulted in deeper meditation and less impact “off of the cushion” by stress.  There is a reason Zen teaches “after enlightenment- laundry.”  It is because we can re-enter the world after a mindfulness practice easily and proceed to do the laundry of the 21st century.

Is this cheating?  Maybe.  But who cares.  I am sure that with discipline, I could get to the quality of meditations that I am getting immediately from this technology. To be fair – I am trained in primordial sound meditation from the Chopra Center and have practiced meditation for most of the last two years. But not to this level of quality.  SO, which is of greater value? Spending a couple hundred dollars for technology or spending years of training?  A Millennial would simply just buy it.  I did as well, and it works.  Oh, and by the way, I also love Pinterest.

How about you? Do you struggle with the voices of “Should” and “Should Not!” inside your head? Do you meditate? Do you feel leveraging technology to enhance a spiritual practice to be cheating? And if so – is that OK?

Turning 65

I have spent the last few years trying to convince myself that turning 65 was a non event. It turns out that God has a tremendous sense of humor. A few weeks ago, I, like many other boomers turned sixty-five. They say that sixty five is the new fifty, and while I still believe that, the excesses of the past come home to roost. In my case, it was centered in the lower back, which has been an issue for years but suddenly became much worse.

My spring of heavy functional exercise caused four lumbar discs to bulge and produce something that I never heard of before – parathesia. My body felt like my cell phone was on vibrate at different points in the pelvic area and down each of my legs. Normal essential and routine bodily functions were being impaired – this was a definite wake up call. Something was very obviously amiss and so I set about identifying the cause. I had an x-ray and then an MRI and to quote my doctor, the results were “not awesome.” The good news received, oddly, from a surgeon, was that I did not require surgery.

Taking a lesson from past health issues and modern medical failures, I decided to care for myself rather than expecting a medical miracle courtesy of my primary care physician. My process included a combination of diet, exercise, acupuncture, chiropractic care, medication, essential oils, meditation, EFT, PSYCH-K and therapeutic massage. Now, six weeks from this milestone date, things seem to be getting better.

What I have learned from this experience so far is that there clearly are new rules for the second half of life. First, we must be smart about how much functional exercise we do and perhaps more importantly, how we do it. Poor posture and poor technique may be survivable in early life, but a lifetime of bad habits regarding lifting and posture will have a profound affect as the shadows lengthen. Second, there is no easy cure for chronic health conditions. I used ten techniques to begin to change my condition. I will add yoga and reflexology to the mix to bring it to an even perfect twelve (call me superstitious!). Included in this mix were twelve professional traditional and nontraditional caregivers – four doctors, a chiropractor, a massage therapist, an acupuncturist, a PSYCH-K practitioner, a personal trainer, a yoga instructor, a reflexologist and my own self coaching (my wife and I are, after all, health coaches).

An important take-away from all of this is that work life balance emerged as a particularly important aspect to be resolved. The twisting of my back quite frankly told me that I could no longer stand the approach that I was taking in a number of areas of my life. To that end, I have begun to change my approach to be more in line with my core values of loving wisdom. The x-ray showed that my spine suffers from scoiolosis, which was new news to me. Interestingly, it is bowed to the left – or to the feminine side of my body. This leads me to believe that the discs that were bulging are related to childhood trauma and the need for grounding. I was left with the realization that I was angry and needed to do something about it if I wanted to feel better.

Upon reflection, what I came to understand was that my core values of loving wisdom, which I discovered previously using the Taylor Protocols Core Value Index, were hidden throughout much of my corporate career. At that time, I relied heavily upon my (arguably inferior) values of powerful knowledge. I tended to just “show up and drive” and placed a far greater value on “facts” over “feelings.” Western society identifies these as the more “masculine” (and often more important) values, while viewing loving wisdom as more “feminine” (and so, necessarily, weaker). I realized, as I started working with people in the business world in my current role, I had inadvertently returned to drawing more on these inferior values that are not core to my essential being. This led to denigrating and limiting who I am and how I “show-up” or behave in a given situation.. I was angry that I had regressed to this older way of being, so out of keeping my essential reality, and the truth was coming out in increasingly aggravated health issues.

This reflection upon and clarification of who I am and how I need to show up is both freeing and empowering. I have begun to tweak my branding ever so slightly to reflect these changes. I’m also now using the full suite of tools and techniques at my disposal including PSYCH-K, EFT and my extensive knowledge of both Christian tradition and eastern wisdom, and its confluence with the quantum reality of our existence.

When I started this practice, I was committed to combining these modalities and teachings into my offerings. But, as I attempted to explain what I do to my referral partners and the general market, I watered down my marketing too much. The result was that I began attracting business that was outside my target market and not in line with my goals. I was attempting to fit in, when I need to fit out. I am an outlier. I do not fit in and the genius of this is that is precisely why people hire me. They want my loving wisdom and outlier perspective. I’ve recommitted to making this available. So in turning 65, it is time for my authentic self to be present in my practice with no apologies. I have come to realize that for me life begins at 65.

How about you? What music is still inside you – and are you ready to play it out loud?

You are not broken

Many people are stuck in victim energy or see others as victims – what if we were not broken?  We choose to remain broken, it is a way of being a victim and not needing to take responsibility for ourselves.  We become our disease.  Oh, I can’t do that – I have cancer. Or we become our limiting belief – I cannot dance, I have two left feet. We can transcend our broken beliefs by channeling the divine through us as was taught by Jesus when he said the kingdom of God is within you. I have been working with John Craig on a new video series. This series of his is an experiment as it is for me.  Working with John has been a gift to me and I hope to produce more work with him in the future.  This first experiment on my part with video has been very enlightening to me.  As photographer I have never liked being in the picture.  This video has allowed me to realize that the potential for this medium is one that I have been ignoring. Enjoy.

 

New Rules are Needed for Work-Life Balance

We are scales.

Not the digitalized platform in which many of us fear. I mean the traditional, two-sided scale. It’s common sense; when one side is more heavily weighted, the device is thrown off balance. We work the same way.

Work-Life Balance is the key driver. From what I have learned from the last few months, new rules define second stage solutions for retirement years.

In my last entry, I focused on the need for balance and meditation – to be centered. While I work with people at the early stages of the second half of life, I have the advantage of being far enough down the road to know where the physical changes hit that show up screaming at you, “BE SMART!”

When I was in my late forties, things changed. My eyesight got to the point where I could not fake it, and I had to wear glasses. I felt old for the first time. Joint pain started at different times, and I just felt worse than I used to. I gave in and got the glasses, and I started working out with less gusto and more care.

Then in my early sixties things dramatically changed again. I fell on uneven ground carrying a camera and tripod in icy conditions. I fell again on black ice with a camera and landed flat on my back. My days often involved an extra unwanted dosage of pain. My skin did not have the depth and translucency of the past. Because of that, I got more radical with my diet, as I have talked about, and my health took a turn for the better.

Then, my wife’s illness, other family issues, increased efforts at launching my own venture, and falling back into the ways of the first half of life for business rules all hit at the same time.

These restrictions could not dominate my life if I wanted to live a long, healthy, happy life. It was time to turn a new leaf and allow myself to take on some new rules.

So, what exactly are these new rules?

  • The need for balance
  • More time for recovery
  • Sleep
  • Be true to your own agenda

Balance is always important, and our health depends on it. But as we get older, I have found that our bodies punish us faster if we break this rule. I was told in my youth that you had to be enjoying yourself fifty-percent of the time while you worked or you were in the wrong job. I am following the rule to find enjoyment in the entirety of my ventures, or find another way of doing them or different ones to do.

I got into this lifestyle so that we could eat well and have a comfortable home environment, and that I could be creative. For the last month, l was working fourteen-hour days and not taking the time for meal prep or other nurturing activities. This double whammy of not balancing my activities between masculine activities and feminine activities and eating food of questionable quality was a disaster for me.

Older bodies take more time to recover. Allow for it. Take an afternoon nap if you need it. While I do not do this, I find that I feel much better if I give myself an afternoon mediation session before starting dinner prep. And doing the prep rather than eating out or ordering in puts better food in our bodies.

Sleep sounds simple. It is more than the time for it, it is the prep for it. Being active late at night makes it difficult for me to sleep. This means that evening classes and teleseminars that I schedule have to allow for time into the next morning to recover. My spouse is younger than I am and gets up early. That means I might have to stay in bed when she gets up, on occasion, in order to get the rest that I need. We all have different needs. We are responsible for determining what they are and holding to them.

This leads to the last item. Be true to your own agenda. The first half of life is combined into two parts: preparing for adulthood and getting our offspring to adulthood. Second Stage Solutions are about OUR needs. This is not narcissistic or selfish thinking. If at this point in our lives we do not meet our needs, we are going to become diseased and put more burden on others. Our hospitals and care facilities are filled with people with all of the diseases of our times. Why not do what makes us happy, and eat good food so we do not get sick? To me, this does not sound like such a bad plan.

I am not telling you to be selfish; I am saying to give back in a way that is onCORE with who you are. So for me, being a caregiver to my spouse while she is still in the workforce is part of who I am. Practicing photography, editing, and using my own work is part of who I am. Understanding new technology trends and applying them is part of who I am. Coaching others is part of who I am. Writing is part of who I am. Teaching is part of who I am. Learning is part of who I am.

So my second stage solutions for me is to balance these in such a way that I feel natural and comfortable. Tomorrow is September 1, in my mind the start if a new school year. Time for new rules. Time to balance the scale.

Inflammation – It’s the Environment, Stupid!

What do cancer, heart disease, arthritis, diabetes, Alzheimer’s all have in common? Besides being words that we hope never come out of our doctors’ mouths, there’s something else; inflammation. Our bodies environment is hot, fat and crowded. Makes you cringe a little, doesn’t it? The standard American diet has been cited by the six doctors that we quoted three weeks ago. They all point to inflammation as a common cause of these diseases of the second half of life. When I think about the effects of inflammation, I am drawn to Death Valley.

I began looking at my own body’s environment when I read the book “Wheat Belly“.  Within this journey, I found that as I cut out my consumption of wheat, and then cheese, things dramatically got better. My thinking got clearer, my joint pain lessoned – in places like knees, and fingers, and the like.  Believe it or not, you can survive without those greasy grilled cheese sandwiches. In fact, you’ll thrive. As I completed my coursework for IIN, studied scores of diets, internalized all of the work on how our diet can improve our health and either prevent or reverse the diseases listed above, I started to become very smug.  I started to believe that I was eating really well.  Then, I contracted one of those pestering ear infections, and for the last three months have struggled to get back on track, from a health perspective at least.

In the afternoon (or late evening, as I sometimes think of it) of our lives, our toleration for mistakes is lessened over that of our earlier years.  I read the “Honeymoon Effect” and listened to the person that started this journey for me – Bruce Lipton – talk about the effects of stress and cortisol on the environment in our bodies.  I commented on this two weeks ago, and I thought, Fine, I just need to relax a bit, and simple awareness will make all of this angst go away.  To a point it did.  But not completely, and certainly not authentically.

I started to meditate more and slow down, but I was on deadline for a number of things.  I did not really focus on it.  I did not mediate as if my life depended on it.  For those of you that prefer the term “prayer” to “meditation” – feel free to substitute.  I remember when I used the “prayer” term – I would turn things over to God, but then take them back.

Here is the dirty little secret that I rediscovered over the last few months.  Encore Entrepreneur – or Entrepreneur – same thing.  One thing is in common to both.  In 1994, I had the pleasure of listenting to Michael Gerber (the author of the E-Myth) speak about the midset of the typical small business owner.  One day, you wake up and you realize you are working for a tyrant.

It does not matter if you are working fourteen hour days for “the man,” for your own thing, or for your cause.  If you are working fourteen hours and you are not having fun with at least half of it, you are probably building up cortisol, which is making your body hot, and not in the glamorous way. It is inflaming it, and it does not matter what food you are eating – you are going to feel bad, maybe even awful.  If you are working fourteen hours a day but living onCORE and in harmony with yourself, then spending the day in Death Valley might not be all bad.

Plein Aire

I can choose – I could be in the “death valley” of business – wandering around, bitching. My mindset: “Damn, I am in death valley, and life sucks.”

Or, I can grab a camera, since I cannot paint, and get up in the early morning light to enjoy the day, even if that camera is metaphorical.  If you have followed this blog, then you know that I identified this a few weeks ago, and here I am still writing about it. Well I did title that entry – Remedial.  And I guess that I am still remedial.  At the time that I wrote it I thought that I had the answer.  Maybe I did, but I left out a real daily centering every day.

One of my favorite spiritual teachers, Wayne Dwyer, has told the story that he would get frenetic – as I have gotten recently with the challenges of launching a business – being “in the world”, so to speak.  He would question another of my favorite teachers Deepak Chopra, and Deepak’s answer was simply one word – MEDITATE. Wayne would say some thing along the lines of, “But Deepak, don’t you think…” And he would simply say, “MEDITATE!”  For me, the food is one thing, and it is very important, but the real answer is to center myself daily, – so I can be IN the world and not OF it, in the famous words of St. Paul.

 

Remedial

It’s 1 AM. You’re lying in bed, unable to sleep. Your body is still, yet your mind is racing with the stress from an overhanging problem in your life. You try to swat away those pestering thoughts like a flea, but you just can’t seem to put your mind at ease

In the weeks leading up to vacation, I had begun to lock and load on three or four topics as they came up. Instead of releasing thoughts that came into my head, I would hold onto one or two and constantly think about them until I was confused and frustrated. To someone that values awareness and has been on a personal spiritual journey, this was surprising: I wasn’t even aware that I was doing it.

What is meant by practicing awareness? It is different for everyone based on his or her personal journey. For me, I need to watch how I respond to those who push my buttons. This is one of the things that I spend a lot of time on with my clients. In this way, it is becoming aware of destructive patterns in our lives and releasing the negative responses that we have. This is not reacting, but rather taking a moment to identify our feelings and mute the antagonistic echoes of our past.

For example, if you are a big Penn State fan and a coworker hates Penn State, you might be triggered into smarmy behavior by that coworker making a comment about pedophiles in sports. A well-dressed, attractive woman might be provoked by a comment about her looks from a man gawking at her and staring at her breasts. Thus, it is not necessarily what is said, but how and by whom it is said that could be the stimulant

These triggers often take us into earlier forms of consciousness that cause us to act like victims or lash out at our verbal attackers. But there are other self-destructive behavior patterns.

They say old habits die hard. Frustrating myself by trying to solve the unsolvable is one of my tendencies. These so-called problems are what has driven the psychotherapy industry for years, and made Oprah and Dr. Phil millionaires.  Why am I so remedial in my approach to life?  Why do I keep making the same mistakes?  Is it because I fixate on the same thoughts?

Sometimes we need to just let go and free ourselves from the prison of negative thoughts. We all have issues that we revisit time and again as we live our lives. For example, the notion that a “man” cannot be an artist was bestowed upon me as far back as I can remember. As a boy that wanted to channel his artistic side, this left me with gender angst and fear of chasing that dream. Coupled with that toxic thought pattern was, “You are just like your mother; you never finish anything.” At the time, this complete discouragement sank my artistic ambition like the Titanic.

The scar of abandonment never faded after my mom died when I was eleven. I developed a fear of desertion that formed the perfect storm as last year ended and this year began. I regressed to past ways of life and tossed away everything I had learned.

In this last year, my wife was undergoing treatment for breast cancer and activating that distress within me. I took on the role of caregiver in our family. I was launching a coaching practice, which is not art, but a largely feminized industry. As a result, I found myself triggered by these old thinking patterns. Once that happens, it can be hard to turn back.

So what do you do? Meditate. Ask the questions and live the answers. The answers come to us though moments of synchronicity, not out of our own heads. Others bring them to us. We do not have to find our own answers; they will find us. But we have to be open to allowing that to happen.

This is particularly important for people in giving professions. People in these roles are expected to have the answers. We don’t have answers; we know what questions to ask others to enable them to seek their own solutions. But we do not have to be asking ourselves questions all of the time. It is okay to just be, and to dream. For me, however, I must be careful to not dream the impossible dream. Because for me, anything that I see as impossible, becomes a challenge to be solved by my egoic mind.

While all things are possible, some dreams have a higher return than others and take less effort. We transform the world one person at a time. I have to remember that that means that I transform myself one thought at a time. I can choose to let thoughts go. With fifty thousand a day, why hold on to one fifty thousand times. The next thought could be an idea that cures cancer.

Getting Well

What does getting well have to do with launching an on core venture?  Everything.

In the second half of life, the behavior patterns we established in the first half start shouting at us. This takes form in issues such as Diabetes, Cancer, Heart Disease, Obesity, Depression, Boredom, Fatigue, and so on.

We believe that the first step in defining your second half of life vision involves getting into the best physical and mental shape possible.  This allows for the energy and clear focus needed in order to determine how you can – as they say in the Army- be all you can be, or as we say – become oncore. If you are beginning to suffer from the effects of the above list, you must learn to get well, not just rely on dealing with it through coping patterns, but get truly well.

Our approach to helping clients figure out what they need to do begins with an assessment tool. This tool allows us to point out examples of what one of our clients calls “Stinkin’ Thinkin’.”  From there, we use a combination of techniques that allow you to come up with your own path to wellness.  We also have a partner network of people we trust that can help you in areas where you might be stuck.

Coaching is not therapy. We do not care where you got your Stinkin’ Thinkin’ patterns. We care about getting you past it so that success becomes attainable. As I listened yesterday to young parents at the children’s museum in Pittsburgh, their advice to their kids to be careful and not to wander away or talk to strangers is not designed to make them afraid of networking in twenty years, or even to go to parties.  It is designed to stop their children from getting hit by a car or keep them away from shady looking characters that might be out to hurt them. This is common sense 101, yet many people have twisted the well intentioned lessons of childhood into the limiting barriers of adulthood So, if you are still blaming Mommy for your thinking patterns, please see a therapist. If however, you are ready to move past your limiting patterns and beliefs; then coaching holds up a mirror to help you understand these thought patterns, teaches you how to improve them and raise your energy levels.

What is important now is what you do with the thought processes that no longer serve who you are today or who you wish to become. Stop stuffing food or alcohol into your body, stop leaching energy into other various control dramas, all because you feel badly from fear and other energy drains.

There are many ways to get well.  Eat real food – not stuff in boxes and cans, exercise appropriately, meditate, practice yoga, get a physical from your doctor, use well sourced nutritional supplements to help alleviate diet deficiencies,  get your spine into proper alignment with chiropractic care, have massages to release toxins from your muscles, drink adequate amounts of water, get enough sleep and create work life balance. The list goes on and can sometimes be daunting; remember that we are here to help you navigate a true path to wellness.

For the next few weeks, we will feature a practitioner in each of these areas as an example of where to go to get information on any of these specific components of getting well.  And if you suddenly realize looking at the list that you have no idea of how to do any of those things, please reach out to us for a free session to get started.

Massage and Meditation

Yesterday was July 4th. It was a little over one year ago that I had my first massage at a spa. Now, I am no expert on the subject, having lived over sixty years before even experiencing my first treatment, but I can tell you that the experience transformed me. In terms of healing and wellness, the power of touch is nothing short of absolutely amazing. My spa experience last year was the warm up to a Chopra Center “Journey into Healing” retreat at the Grove Park Inn in Asheville N.C. The back to back experiences of the massage and teachings left me altered and renewed at a DNA level. It started my own journey from being “worried well” into true wellness. I have since come to believe that one simply cannot successfully launch a third stage of life venture unless our core body is healthy and well.

Recently I’ve been reading “With Purpose – Going from Success to Significance in Work and Life” by Ken Dychtwald and Daniel J. Kadlec, in which the authors coin the term “middlescence”.  They write that until the early part of the last century there was no term for the period of adolescence, noting that G. Stanley Hall invented the concept. This is correct, yet they failed to acknowledge that Mr. Hall went on to write, in 1923 “Senescence in the second half of Life” which describes exactly what Dychtwald and Kadlec are referring to as this new phase of “middlescence”.  In fact Mr. Hall wrote the senescence book as his middlescence (or Life 3.0 as we call it) effort. So the three authors agree and, in the case of both Dr Dychtwald and Mr. Hall, dedicated their lives to understanding this late life phenomenon of needing purpose in the evening of life in order to feel truly fulfilled.

I do not profess to be inventing anything at this phase of my life. For me, that time is now past. While I share a patent for a technology product in my history, I am, quintessentially, the guy who figures out what new “stuff” is good for. So, true to form, I now ask what do we do with the knowledge we have gained.  Likewise, coaches will often ask clients a variation on the theme of “what would your life be like if it was true for you that the last thirty years of your life would be driven by your passion, gifts and purpose in a unique way that you now have the time, ego, and understanding to access?

Before he died in 1924, G. Stanley Hall, who lived in a Newtonian mechanical world, said “The man of the future may, and even must, do things impossible in the past and acquire new motor variations not given by heredity.”  In the areas of health and wellness, more than half of what we have learned has been discovered in the last five years. That knowledge is still growing and in a few years no doubt more than half of what we know then will have been discovered after I wrote this blog. A good example of such learning is the recent idea that fully half of what we used to chalk up to “hereditary characteristics” is in fact social programming of our subconscious by our parents in the first few years of life and that  it can be re-programmed. In consequence, I believe the biggest “motor variation” we must strive for is a way of accomplishing this re-programing of the subconscious mind to be more in tune and aligned with our core values and selves.

To effect this mental shift, we “lay” practitioners do not necessarily need to invent anything new, we instead must practice the gift of discernment. What is the knowledge level and currency of your “official” practitioner? Is he or she a life-long learner? Many physicians were trained in a Newtonian model to believe that the body is a mechanical structure.  As we know now, such is not the case. Our bodies can be much more accurately perceived as holographic quantum beings, enjoying virtually unlimited potential and the capacity to constantly recreating itself. What we must now accept is that our minds and bodies are inextricably linked. Our wellness, in the mind, body and soul, is dependent upon our core physical body being in harmony with its surroundings. In essence, our body is linked to our way of thinking and being. Put simply, our thoughts become reality. We have seen this in many areas of our modern world, from studies that seek to unravel the power of prayer, in movements touting the limitless capability of positive thinking, and in our fascination with the concepts of empowered, motivated leadership in the business world.

Over the coming weeks and months we will explore how to move from being worried well to wellness. For today, I am going to pass on the two concepts that I took away from the Grove Park Inn. Massage and Meditation.

Yesterday I was catching up on my research into Spiritually and Health and found a DVD on how couples and families can massage one another (our monthly spa trips are simply not enough). I have already shared links on how to get started in meditation but I realize there are skeptics out there. For those of you that are interested, and those of you that are skeptical, don’t take just my opinion. Here is a link to the website for transcendentalist meditation which links other sites proving the benefits you will experience by incorporating meditation in your life.

Mickey Mantle commented shortly before he died at the age of 63 that if he knew he would have lived this long he would have taken better care of himself.  For many people approaching this age, we have new knowledge that can be applied to our way of living in order to bring about healing and rejuvenation.  Many of these techniques and dietary changes take a long time to implement.  I have been working at diet and exercise regularly for the last 23 years since I healed myself from a serious illness using techniques that I learned from an early mind body physician – Dr. Bernie Siegel. This experience has led me to an ever increasing understanding of the mind body connection. The progress of the first several decades of daily exercise and an evolving way of eating expanded exponentially, making a quantum leap, when I began regular meditation and became aware of the healing power of touch.

Earlier this week, I took my ‘young in mind’ – but – ‘old in body’ mother-in-law to a doctor apt. When she was told that she would have to endure yet another procedure, she looked at me and asked if my wife (her daughter) would be available to go with her because the touch of my wife’s strong, bony fingers on her wrinkled and aged hand brings her comfort and energy. This exchange left me thinking that we must not reserve that touch and energy only for times of stress or wait until we are too old in body to try to start truly living the lives we were born to lead. If we are going to live till 90 we must decide what this life will look like. Will we be dependent on oxygen machines or wheelchairs, or will we be living active vital lives.  Deepak Chopra jokes that life is a sexually transmitted disease that is always fatal, and someone once told me that there are no guarantees on a birth certificate. It is far too easy to underestimate the power we hold inside ourselves and the ability we have to share it, comforting and healing each other and ourselves.

Creating your OnCore Venture

I have talked a lot about discovery in this blog as a way to provide some background information about who I am, and what my belief system is.  I am a firm believer in authenticity – my own and yours.  As a certified professional coach, I help people create the life they were born to live, at home and at work; which incidentally, to me are now one and the same.

Earlier this week, I introduced the topic of Wellness, which I believe to be a core component of living an OnCore Life.  Today we begin the discussion of creating your OnCore Venture.  As we say in the “about us” page, wellness and ventures go hand in hand.  Core to both is an honest, on-going discovery process.  I will continue to talk here about mine, and also allow others to share their stories in this space.

In deciding on your venture, where do you begin? Recently I shared that I tried making Photography my life after moving on from my Life 2.0 senior executive career. After a while however, I found that path lacking – those hoodoo’s in the photo above are not found in either eastern or western Pennsylvania.  I had arrived there by listening to the voices in my head (we sometimes like to call this intuition but it can be tricky), yet only discussed it with my spouse.  Now, my wife is very aware and supportive, but as a couple, well, we can be like all couples – both dysfunctional and delusional. Hindsight being what it is, I see now that this was merely a stepping stone in a more fulfilling, authentic journey.

I suspect that the way I finally found my OnCore venture is similar for most people. It is a process of interacting with others, getting out of one’s own head, and showing up in new places.  Davidji of the Chopra Center, teaches us to “ask the questions, live the answers.”  The universe is an abundant place and the answers come through synchronicity.  Yes, I started asking what is my purpose in my daily mediation practice, but it was in living the answers that people first started asking if was a coach, and then began telling me that yes, I am a coach.

I share with you what worked for me and what my clients are telling me also works for them. I found my answer for what is evolving into a fulfilling life through a practice of daily mediation, a plain and simple western interpretation of the more rigid eastern principles.  Davidji also teaches that at the Chopra Center “we are not Ayurvedic fundamentalists.” Applied to a daily mediation practice, this means go ahead and be comfortable.  Sit in a comfortable chair. Relax. If you want to stare at a wall and be smacked on the back of the head, by all means, go to a Buddhist Center. But if you want to be comfortable, relax and tune into what the universe is saying to you, find a comfortable place and start asking the questions “Who am I?,” “ What do I want?,” and “What is my purpose?” on a daily basis.

I began my own mediation practice through a Chopra center 21 day mediation challenge. The principle being that if you do something for 21 days it becomes a practice or habit.  Before making a decision on whether or not to try this, realize that it is fundamentally a way of learning to be comfortable with yourself.  Learning to be still. Once you can be still in the silence of meditation, you can then learn to bring that quietness and calm to all areas of your reality. From there, the possibilities are limitless. I came to understand that the thousands of thoughts which enter my mind everyday do not need to be dwelled on. They enter and leave of their own volition. It is my mind that holds on to them and worries about them. I now choose to just let them be.

As you begin to mediate, then start to ask your friends and family what you should do with the rest of your life. If they are like mine, they will not tell you what you really need to hear. If this is the case, find a group of people that will hold your agenda in their hearts and minds as they engage with you in these discussions.

At OnCore Ventures, we conduct monthly Life 3.0 Mastermind groups to discuss how people are transitioning from their current life of working for a living to a new way of launching the work/life they were born to live.

We have a limited number of openings for our July group which meets weekly for one hour on Wednesday evenings at 7:30 PM, beginning on July 11. Participation in the group is free, although there are two required pre-reading assignments. For more information reach out to me at Mastermind, and in the meantime please treat yourself and sign up for a 21 day meditation challenge.  The last one offered was a mind-body odyssey that my life partner and I found to be a refreshing renewal.

What you can expect to get out of the Mastermind group is a clear cut group of options for what your OnCore Venture can be – whether it is to say in play in your current job and change the way that you show up, find a business to create or buy, focus on enjoying your hobby, watching your grandchildren, shopping for the elderly or going back to school.  You will work with others just like you to figure out what’s next for you.